Odd regret.

What I was realizing recently is that in many ways in multiple areas I was in and had some success in, I was uncontrollably prevented by "one major thing" from being a full participant and even getting started on the typical path. Like, because of bullies and a toxic graduate program, I had around 3 (!) wasted years that made me hemorrhage money and energy and that in total really put applying for academic jobs out of the question, even though a commmittee member encouraged me to and spoke about work-arounds, which would have been plausible in most cases, but not doable in my case because of the long-term severity of the situation. So, I was successful in that, but couldn't really start out. And, as I sought to transition career sectors, I had enough relevant experience to get interviews for comms jobs at smaller organizations, but, because admin and faculty were off-mission and wouldn't set up internships and automatic resume-scanners had begun, that resume gap effectively barred me from getting interviews on a scale possible for someone with my credentials even 3-5 years earlier. So, I was incredibly hindered, in pursuing that area. And, in terms of trying to pursue public office, despite a true and compelling story, different personal supporters who encouraged me, etc., the standard fundraising advice that I was getting in multiple early trainings, though *seeming* generally applicable, only really applied to people from certain higher social classes who were first-time candidates, as I only realized too late in the process. And, there too, increasing wealth inequality made it hard for me to fundraise from friends and family etc. on a level that would have been possible even 5-10 years earlier, and during a time when costs had rapidly risen from the last cycle and so you needed more money than ever. So, there again, I looked good on paper, but lacked one big basic (money). Just once, it would be nice to be on a path and have opportunities stay relatively constant, or at least decline slow enough where you could grapple with them and overcome the challenges.