New neighborhood tidbit (1 of 3): Yuppie.

The other day I was unlocking my bike from off a signpost between the sidewalk and the street on a strip of grass that's in front of the apartment building next door, and this a-few-years-older-than-me (white) yuppie woman who was gardening next door called out from across the yard was like, "Oh, hi, I'm so glad you came out," and she proceeded without introducing herself to say that she'd noticed the bike parked there for the past several days and she's been meaning to check into city ordinances, but she was hoping I could move it, since she's an owner and their building provides a bike rack inside, and having my bike parked out there was an eyesore.

I told her that I tried to park it inside my building, but there's limited slots, so when I have to park it outside, I try to do it near my house in an out-of-the-way spot away from the main sidewalk, and that was the best place.

"Thank you for agreeing not to park it there," she was like.

"Hey, I'll park it elsewhere when I can, just like I've been doing," I was like.

"Thank you for agreeing to park it there," she was like, in the same exact tone of voice.

"Hey, no prob," I was like, "I'll park it elsewhere when I can, just like I've been doing, just let me know when you find out about that ordinance, I'd like to know if this space is still an option if other places are filled."

White people are so uncool.

Addendum.

Forgot -

Mail - Most stuff forwarded, had to call about change of address on magazine subscription (the online form didn't work), already sent out, not sure if the issue is being forwarded (is due to arrive by tomrrow, the post office should be forwarding it).

My scrotum - Am using hydrocortisone cream.

Updates: Irons in the Fire.

Towel-bar in my bathroom: Installed as of Tuesday.

Census job: Made sure my application was forwarded to the right office (they first sent it to the wrong office), they called me one day for a job while I was in a meeting and said to call them back by 11pm that night, I called them like 3 hours later (around 4pm), job was already given away, but I'm still in the applicant pool.

Bar or restaurant job: Got an interview with a bar near me to be a waiter for their patio (or other jobs in the future as people leave or cut down on hours, esp. around the time that school starts), but the owners said to call me back once I heard back about whether I got into the...

Summer Latin program: Wrote away to the priest like 3 months ago by mail, no word back (he's not online and does not give out his program), no word until the day I get called for the bar interview, and then he mails me this really intense Latin exam to mail back ASAP, so I took 3 days and did one each for the junior and senior level since I don't know where I'd place, and I sent that back and am now waiting for results.

Key: Wrote the building company manager about the front door key (can't duplicate it without permission), he said only leasees can have it and so I can't get another copy, sulked for a few days and then remembered that you don't need permission to duplicate the door-key for the alley door, so if I have guests, I'll use copies of the alley door key and graciously let them have the front door key.

Cool white hat: Went back to Marshall's this weekend, they still had 5 left, bought 2 of them (they're white and stain easily, I frequently lose hats, and people loved this one!).

Book-shelves: Contacted my one (white) friend from Mississippi about taking me to IKEA this weekend, but he can't.

Plants, shoe-rack, coat-tree: Still haven't looked into them.

Mormon couple.

The other week there was a dinner at a prof's house in honor of visiting students from several different academic programs. At one point in the night, everyone stood back to the edges of the room and formed a circle so we could all introduce ourselves... The one cool Mormon guy I know was on the opposite end of the room from his wife (me and her joked about it and I was like, "Man, this is just like that breakfast table scene from 'Citizen Kane'), and when introducing himself academically, he was really enthusiastic and was like, "My name is such-and-such and I'm a 3rd year Ph.D. in such-and-such a program, and I love the Greco-Roman context of Christianity, and Middle Platonic philosophy, and Lucretius." Then, after a pause, he got sheepish and was like, "And my wife."

Later, too, his wife, who's an accountant, was telling me how accountants go crazy at 5pm on April 15th, and that usually they go to some bar and everything is on the company and all her coworkers get shitfaced.

"You have no idea how wild accountants can get," she was like.

...new neighborhood tidbits...

I love all the West African restaurants in my new neighborhood.

When a friend was in town for a sociology conference, me and her and another couple people went out to this Nigerian bistro a few blocks from my house. It's cafeteria style and very reasonable, and they have all these really modern-looking tables and chairs and hand-washing basins and mood lighting, and then everyone eats with their hands. The servers are also on African time, so one of my friends had to wait 20 minutes to get her meal plated up, even though it was cafeteria-style and most everything was ready... The server had to go to the back to get some trays of something-or-another, but then he switched trays, and when he put the meat in a dish, he put the tomato sauce on like a teaspoon on a time, though there was a ladle sitting right there.

Like that weekend, I went back to get a malt soda and use their free wi-fi on Sunday evening, and bunch of Nigerians were watching this American-Idolesque talent tryout for some BET show that had auditions in Lagos, and laughed uproariously at all the bad singers who were trying out.

Forgot forgot forgot...

That horrid day when I bled all over my natural-weave carpet, I used a piece of floss to draw a straight line and mark out where I wanted to put in the cuphooks under the one kitchen cabinet in My Haven of Peace and Light.

But, the floss dispenser dropped behind the stove while I was holding the one floss end, and as much as I tried to pull it up so I could grab it, I just managed to yank more and more floss out of it, till yards and yards were behind the stove (finally did yank it hard enough to lift it up to where I could grab it).

So, I had to rewind a lot of floss, but then I got bored, and just dumped it in the small medicine cabinet in the bathroom above the sink, and now whenever I need a piece of floss, I just cut one off with my nosehair scissors.

Read "Game Change".

I read "Game Change" (that book on the 2008 campaign) in like 5 days (had to wait a while to get it from the library on campus; there were like 2 or 3 people ahead of me on the waiting list).

Two things:

1) Though people didn't know it, McCain seems to have been as dangerous for the U.S. as Palin; he made many major decisions based on how they felt and how they fed into his self-image - "Im a risk-taker!", he would say a lot, or something like that - and shirked necessary duties (like debate prep), and didn't do necessay long-term planning (like doing in-depth screening on VP candidates!)...

Talking to my dad, he was like, "I can see that, the guy's a lightweight. What was his rank in the naval academy again?", and then said that McCain got a free pass from the media for years on his image, but his erraticness came out in the campaign.

2) For the VP debate, Michigan governor Jennifer Granholm helped Joe Biden to prep - by studying Palin's debate-style in-depth through transcripts and YouTube clips, and then debating in her style, complete with long, rambling answers and convoluted syntax, and occasional Palin-like gaffes, such as ending an answer on race with a homestyle joke making fun of a Obama through a reference to "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?".

I would pay through the nose to see tapes of those mock debates. If I ever am at a Q&A with Granholm, I want to ask her what she did to prepare and get in persona, and whether she thought it helped Biden.