From my one (black) friend who works at the main library on campus, when she found out about my one testicle rash that was actually larvae eggs from an African parasite -
We started talking about testicles, and she said that you can tell God made humans, since the one testicle is always a little more forward than the other, so you don't crush them when you sit down.
I then said that I could also make the argument that there is no God, since there's these animals that are hatching on my testicle, and who the hell'd make that.
I also had some spaghetti that I was eating, and she thought it was funny, since that looked like worms, and then I pretended to lift a fork down to my "friends" on my balls, and when I left and she said bye, I told her not to be rude, and to say bye to my friends!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
Rash appt.
I had an appoint for that one rash on my scrotum that turned out to be larvae -
The Infectous Disease people gave me a prescription for 6 pills - 3 in the morning one day, 3 in the evening, and the worm is dead.
But, its eggs will be in my system forever, though that really doesn't matter since the adult worms will have stopped producing them, and they'll be dead, but they'll just be in there, and they'll show up for yours when they take samples from me and run lab tests... The doc used to work in a VA hospital and he remembers that a few years ago they took out colon polyps from a guy who had been in Japanese POW camps in WWII and had the parasite I had for a little bit, and eggs still turned up in the biopsy.
He also told me that the parasite eggs showed up so well on the biopsy, that they could not only ID the genus, but also the species, from this little spine coming off one of the eggs. So, though the dermatology people were going to try to get me to do urine and stool samples, I really didn't have to, that was just them doing it for fun since it was something they didn't see that often.
The dermatology did try to get urine and stool samples from me when they came down to the Infectious Disease floor to talk with me... I did the urine, but the stool collector pan you put in the toilet was really shallow and I was afraid the shit would mound up and hit my ass or splatter back, so I couldn't take one, and the dermatology resident was really disappointed and asked me to take it with me while I went to go get blood taken on a different floor, just in case I needed to go.
He also had a digital camera to take pics of my scrotum, and said that the (black?) nurses out in Infectious Disease were making fun of him, saying he better take good pics if he had such a big camera.
When he showed me the pics, he blew one up to show me the main inflamed part, and I told him to scroll up a bit so he could see where the (small) new spot was.
"Look how subtle it is," he said, pointing out how well it blended with the flesh.
He also said that they were going to use this pics as a "what would you do?" case study for people, because it was a rare case and then the rash symptoms were rare on top of that (most people come in with blood in the urine), so to biopsy the rash or ask about travel history wasn't the obvious thing to do.
He also also said that I might have a permanent, grainy-looking scar from the eggs in my scrotum, though that would only be clear in a month or so once my immune system calmed down, since it might be making the area inflamed and looking really bad.
The Infectous Disease people gave me a prescription for 6 pills - 3 in the morning one day, 3 in the evening, and the worm is dead.
But, its eggs will be in my system forever, though that really doesn't matter since the adult worms will have stopped producing them, and they'll be dead, but they'll just be in there, and they'll show up for yours when they take samples from me and run lab tests... The doc used to work in a VA hospital and he remembers that a few years ago they took out colon polyps from a guy who had been in Japanese POW camps in WWII and had the parasite I had for a little bit, and eggs still turned up in the biopsy.
He also told me that the parasite eggs showed up so well on the biopsy, that they could not only ID the genus, but also the species, from this little spine coming off one of the eggs. So, though the dermatology people were going to try to get me to do urine and stool samples, I really didn't have to, that was just them doing it for fun since it was something they didn't see that often.
The dermatology did try to get urine and stool samples from me when they came down to the Infectious Disease floor to talk with me... I did the urine, but the stool collector pan you put in the toilet was really shallow and I was afraid the shit would mound up and hit my ass or splatter back, so I couldn't take one, and the dermatology resident was really disappointed and asked me to take it with me while I went to go get blood taken on a different floor, just in case I needed to go.
He also had a digital camera to take pics of my scrotum, and said that the (black?) nurses out in Infectious Disease were making fun of him, saying he better take good pics if he had such a big camera.
When he showed me the pics, he blew one up to show me the main inflamed part, and I told him to scroll up a bit so he could see where the (small) new spot was.
"Look how subtle it is," he said, pointing out how well it blended with the flesh.
He also said that they were going to use this pics as a "what would you do?" case study for people, because it was a rare case and then the rash symptoms were rare on top of that (most people come in with blood in the urine), so to biopsy the rash or ask about travel history wasn't the obvious thing to do.
He also also said that I might have a permanent, grainy-looking scar from the eggs in my scrotum, though that would only be clear in a month or so once my immune system calmed down, since it might be making the area inflamed and looking really bad.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Went to martinis with my one friend from Buffalo.
My one friend from Buffalo's so funny because she's petite and I meet her at the subway stop and she's so well-dressed in a fashionable top and heels like someone out of Sex and the City or something, and I'm asking her how she's doing, and she's like, "Good, I think I did well on the Sanskrit exam today!".
Then, since it had just started majorly raining, we hailed a cab to take us to that martini place instead of walking, and when we hop in, the Stanley Cup finals are on the radio, so she leans in the window between the seats and asks the cabbie, "Hey, what's the score?".
Then, since it had just started majorly raining, we hailed a cab to take us to that martini place instead of walking, and when we hop in, the Stanley Cup finals are on the radio, so she leans in the window between the seats and asks the cabbie, "Hey, what's the score?".
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Baseball!
My one lawyer friend from Missouri had gotten tickets to "bring your dog" day at a local major league baseball game, and me and her and my one friend with the cat and my one friend from Buffalo all went.
But, my one lawyer friend from Missouri's papillon was sick from licking plates people had set down on the ground at a party at her house a couple weekends ago, and so couldn't come.
During the game, me and my one friend with the cat walked up the stairs to go to the concessions area and get a hot dog or something, and someone had this hugely huge dog with them at the top of the steps, like a Great Dane or something, but only bigger.
"That is one big dog," my one friend with the cat was like,
"You know," I was like, "I think that's the breed that fucked Linda Lovelace."
My one friend with the cat didn't say too much after that, but just shook her head and was like, "TMI, TMI!"
But, my one lawyer friend from Missouri's papillon was sick from licking plates people had set down on the ground at a party at her house a couple weekends ago, and so couldn't come.
During the game, me and my one friend with the cat walked up the stairs to go to the concessions area and get a hot dog or something, and someone had this hugely huge dog with them at the top of the steps, like a Great Dane or something, but only bigger.
"That is one big dog," my one friend with the cat was like,
"You know," I was like, "I think that's the breed that fucked Linda Lovelace."
My one friend with the cat didn't say too much after that, but just shook her head and was like, "TMI, TMI!"
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
What I always think when I wear my very light-colored polo shirts...
...my neck is always sweaty, but is it sweaty enough to leave a really nasty stain on the collar that everyone can see?
Monday, June 7, 2010
My other craving lately...
...even though it's been super muggy out:
Ramen noodles, hot chili-flavored ramen noodles.
Sometimes I have ice cream afterwards.
Ramen noodles, hot chili-flavored ramen noodles.
Sometimes I have ice cream afterwards.
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Coffee.
Is this too much coffee for a day?:
8am - four shots of espresso.
noon - four shots of espresso.
4pm - four shots of espresso.
8am - four shots of espresso.
noon - four shots of espresso.
4pm - four shots of espresso.
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