Job application depression, witnessed.

So, there's a (Colombian) (STEM) student who I know from around town in the one (college) town that I now live in, and I think he does something in (biology), but he also does large-scale statistical analysis, and I think he has also also taught himself programming for that, to become indispensable to his lab.

But, he recently was saying that he's been down this term because he's put out easily 50-60 applications for internships and fellowships, and he's had nothing but rejection.

I wonder how many of those are posts in academia, and how many are industry-specific. If it's the latter, I am honestly shocked, because it seems like he's so well-prepared for any position with very skills-heavy STEM preparation.

I was telling him that I transitioned into eldercare 5+ years ago because I was hoping to avoid a lot of that, and then after decent eldercare work severely shrunk due to chronic sectoral mismanagement, I just went into restaurant work, since I didn't feel like being in that mental space of job applications, it's so much wasted time and effort for any sort of traction at all through jobs that are often okay at best, and often short-term.

I told him, too, that it's been hard on me not to have a profession, and I do talk to people in different lines of work and I do keep my eyes open on the look-out for opportunities, but I just don't want to go back to that indefinite awful process, and that in some ways when I look back on the past few years, I feel happier with my time choices to have d*cked around and done research and writing and whatnot, than to have spent it on that, especially now that some of my research choices have been paying off.

I mean, you never know when you're going to die, and can you imagine kicking it when you're in your third or fourth cycle of indefinite employment hell, and everyone looks at your coffin and is like, what was that all about, they never did anything or got anywhere, they didn't even really have a job, what were they doing all that time.

That's what I call a wasted life.

Research morbidity.

So, I busted my *ss and wrote up a research finding precis (8,000+ words!), and I confidentially gave it to 2 friends in pdf form, along with website login info and instructions on what they should do in case I get hit by a truck before I can publicly present anything.

It really would be a shame if my one major major major finding on the one ancient language that I've been studying intensively for the past few years somehow never made it to light, and now I've taken the necessary steps to guard against that possibility.

So, barring someone having the same idea (unlikely) or stealing it (slightly more likely, but still unlikely), I'm on track by the end of the year to always being "that guy" who figured out that one thing with a very famous language, within its language family, to the point where people looking back will always be able to tell the grammars written before me, and then the grammars written after me.

All in all, it's quite something.

"Now that's a third act," I keep telling myself.

Pre-work pep music (5 of 5): A song that has a great lyrical opening.

At other times very occasionally before work at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now, I play this song.

I like the opening sound and lyrics, but then somehow I feel it doesn't hold up all the way through, though.

I also think that part about her looking just okay enough just wouldn't fly, nowadays.

Pre-work pep music (4 of 5): A song that has a great guitar opening.

Occasionally, I play this song while I get ready for work, at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now.

It has a great guitar part, to open.

Pre-work pep music (3 of 5): A song that only occasionally strikes me.

Every great once in a while, I go on a spurt and play this song while I'm getting ready to go to work at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now.

But, it doesn't strike me that often.

Though, I have to say, that it's one of the great regrets in my life that I didn't see this movie right when it came out in theaters, before they re-released it to take out scenes that were deemed controversial.

Pre-work pep music (2 of 5): A song that's too short.

Occasionally before work at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now, I go on a kick and play this other song, and I do love to sing along to the verses.

 

But, it's too short, and I often have to play it two or three or even four times in a row, to keep it going while I'm getting ready.

Pre-work pep music (1 of 5): My most popular song.

So, before work at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now, I often cue up one of a handful of songs on a CD to blast, while I change into my work clothes of a black t-shirt and khakis and get my stuff together to go in.

This is probably the song that I play the most, it has such a good vibe, and I just imagine someone in a flowing dress dancing by themselves in a corner while they're on LSD somewhere in California in the late 60s.

MOOD.

I would really, really, really love to sing this at karaoke, by the way.

If you did it right, people would be just enwrapt, looking at you like, "What the heck is this."