Last weekend I went to a Mexican food festival that was just great -
Tons of restaurants that sold tacos and sizeable almost-entress for $1-3 each.
I ate like $13 worth of food, which was like $3 too much, but it was just so good!
Unfortunately, the next day I shit like 3 times, big black squishy pieces of shit that all floated on top of the toilet water.
After the festival, I hit some neighborhood bars, which were mostly or entirely Mexican.
At one, there was a (lower income) (older) (white) bartender. The news was on, and when a piece about Trayvon Martin came on, she just gave this pissed-off guttural sigh and snatched up the remote and changed channels to the other news station, as if she thought the news was just blowing the Trayvon Martin case all out of proportion.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Friday, June 1, 2012
One year of tutoring!
At our session last weekend, the one lawyer who studies Latin with me pointed out that we had begun Memorial Day weekend last year, so it had been a year since we started.
That made me feel really good.
In that time, I had him review all his Latin grammar (which he had studied like 20 years ago), re-memorize everything, began him on real Latin texts within 6 weeks (selected Apophthegmata Patrum), and then moved into Thomas Aquinas's Summa when he was ready. Bit by bit, I have had him read other texts in Latin - for example, the Jesuit Ratio Studiorum sections on scholastic philosophy, and the commentary of Cardinal Cajetan on the sections of the Summa that we were reading. Last week, we began reading a bit of Cicero's De Legibus, because it's on natural law (an interest of his).
It was very affirming, because the session last weekend was his best ever - even though he hadn't prepared anything because of his busy work schedule, he was able to sightread a good 15-16 sentences in the Summa with minimal help, over the course of like 50-55 minutes.
As he pointed out, too, there have been a couple times where because of his travel schedule for work he didn't have Latin for like 3 weeks at a time, so he said we've really only studying together for the equivalent of like 10 months, over the course of a year.
That really was a ton of progress for him, and it made me so happy.
That made me feel really good.
In that time, I had him review all his Latin grammar (which he had studied like 20 years ago), re-memorize everything, began him on real Latin texts within 6 weeks (selected Apophthegmata Patrum), and then moved into Thomas Aquinas's Summa when he was ready. Bit by bit, I have had him read other texts in Latin - for example, the Jesuit Ratio Studiorum sections on scholastic philosophy, and the commentary of Cardinal Cajetan on the sections of the Summa that we were reading. Last week, we began reading a bit of Cicero's De Legibus, because it's on natural law (an interest of his).
It was very affirming, because the session last weekend was his best ever - even though he hadn't prepared anything because of his busy work schedule, he was able to sightread a good 15-16 sentences in the Summa with minimal help, over the course of like 50-55 minutes.
As he pointed out, too, there have been a couple times where because of his travel schedule for work he didn't have Latin for like 3 weeks at a time, so he said we've really only studying together for the equivalent of like 10 months, over the course of a year.
That really was a ton of progress for him, and it made me so happy.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Grad school realization.
The further I get along in grad school, the more like I feel that I've been sold a bill of goods by the Humanities.
Since I've joined, the jobs in my area that were in seminaries have dried up due to the economy - a lot of those institutions are closing! - and since the economy froze up money in the system, people have been graduating and not getting jobs.
Even with the one-year positions that were traditionally renewed for a 2nd or 3rd year or often turned into tenure-track jobs after they saw if they liked you, have become awful - a lot of people I know have gone to one with promises of more, and then towards spring at the last minute they don't renew the position, and people have to max out credit cards in order to move somewhere else.
And this is for graduates of the one of the best programs in the country!
The common denominator is that people have to be willing to take a *huge* financial risk and overwork for several years, or they have to have family money, or money or health insurance through a spouse.
In a way, it's almost like the internship stuff that's getting established elsewhere - you have to have money and sink a lot of your own money in, in order to have a fighting chance.
From everything I can see, the only reason people without money keep going into Humanities ph.d.s is that there's an information gap, and they don't *really* understand what their odds are.
A part of me wonders how many of the professors I've gotten encouragement to continue on from over the years really have family money, or graduated at a time that that doesn't matter.
Since I've joined, the jobs in my area that were in seminaries have dried up due to the economy - a lot of those institutions are closing! - and since the economy froze up money in the system, people have been graduating and not getting jobs.
Even with the one-year positions that were traditionally renewed for a 2nd or 3rd year or often turned into tenure-track jobs after they saw if they liked you, have become awful - a lot of people I know have gone to one with promises of more, and then towards spring at the last minute they don't renew the position, and people have to max out credit cards in order to move somewhere else.
And this is for graduates of the one of the best programs in the country!
The common denominator is that people have to be willing to take a *huge* financial risk and overwork for several years, or they have to have family money, or money or health insurance through a spouse.
In a way, it's almost like the internship stuff that's getting established elsewhere - you have to have money and sink a lot of your own money in, in order to have a fighting chance.
From everything I can see, the only reason people without money keep going into Humanities ph.d.s is that there's an information gap, and they don't *really* understand what their odds are.
A part of me wonders how many of the professors I've gotten encouragement to continue on from over the years really have family money, or graduated at a time that that doesn't matter.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
What toughness.
I've had a heck of a couple weeks.
I got waitlisted for the departmental fellowship, which people thought I was a shoo-in for even last year.
My course I spent a lot of time on in accordance with professionalization advice got turned down.
Between the two, that means my finances for next year are shot, esp. because of the terms of grad student loans in Congress (6.8% interest accruing right away!).
This comes at a time, too, when I'm realizing that I'll need a cushion of money to survive, if I don't get a tenure-track job right away after graduation... So many people I know took one-years and had to charge moving bills to credit cards, etc., or stay enrolled so they can have health insurance - both of which cost money that would get sucked up next year.
On top of that, I thought I had worked out a tight thesis and dissertation chapter plan with my advisor, but then at our meeting yesterday she said she thought I was rehashing old scholarship, and she endorsed this framework that one of my readers tossed out at the workshop, that I actually think uses catchy terminology and has some fatal flaws, despite evocatively capturing a few notable things that are already covered in the framework that I proposed but aren't at the heart of the historical change that I'm describing.
I wrote up a written response that nicely pointed what I thought the gaps/oversights were, as a starting point for a conversation, but she didn't seem convinced, and urged me to reconsider the framework (!).
Unfortunately, the meeting was cut short and we couldn't complete it then...
It's so weird, I have conversations with her and the other historian of the modern era, and it seems like every few meetings they forget the whole point of my dissertation and try to use historically inaccurate formulations that I'm rebutting (and which I explicitly said I was rebutting in my proposal and fellowship applications). Somehow, though, the person on my committee who primarily studies the Bible gets *exactly* what I'm doing (although she unfortunately didn't attend the workshop; I think she would have come to my defense).
So, now I'm feeling adrift, without a dissertation plan, and facing big loans and depleted savings. I was crying a lot this week.
I talked with the Dean of Students. The solution seems to be a 15-20 hour a week job on top of my tutoring, so I can make ends meet and save up a little cash and take out no loans. That will massively slow down my dissertation progress, though, and make my committee unhappy.
I got waitlisted for the departmental fellowship, which people thought I was a shoo-in for even last year.
My course I spent a lot of time on in accordance with professionalization advice got turned down.
Between the two, that means my finances for next year are shot, esp. because of the terms of grad student loans in Congress (6.8% interest accruing right away!).
This comes at a time, too, when I'm realizing that I'll need a cushion of money to survive, if I don't get a tenure-track job right away after graduation... So many people I know took one-years and had to charge moving bills to credit cards, etc., or stay enrolled so they can have health insurance - both of which cost money that would get sucked up next year.
On top of that, I thought I had worked out a tight thesis and dissertation chapter plan with my advisor, but then at our meeting yesterday she said she thought I was rehashing old scholarship, and she endorsed this framework that one of my readers tossed out at the workshop, that I actually think uses catchy terminology and has some fatal flaws, despite evocatively capturing a few notable things that are already covered in the framework that I proposed but aren't at the heart of the historical change that I'm describing.
I wrote up a written response that nicely pointed what I thought the gaps/oversights were, as a starting point for a conversation, but she didn't seem convinced, and urged me to reconsider the framework (!).
Unfortunately, the meeting was cut short and we couldn't complete it then...
It's so weird, I have conversations with her and the other historian of the modern era, and it seems like every few meetings they forget the whole point of my dissertation and try to use historically inaccurate formulations that I'm rebutting (and which I explicitly said I was rebutting in my proposal and fellowship applications). Somehow, though, the person on my committee who primarily studies the Bible gets *exactly* what I'm doing (although she unfortunately didn't attend the workshop; I think she would have come to my defense).
So, now I'm feeling adrift, without a dissertation plan, and facing big loans and depleted savings. I was crying a lot this week.
I talked with the Dean of Students. The solution seems to be a 15-20 hour a week job on top of my tutoring, so I can make ends meet and save up a little cash and take out no loans. That will massively slow down my dissertation progress, though, and make my committee unhappy.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Nice gesture.
Over the past number of years, I've been trying to imitate the behavior of people I admire, and one of the things that I admire is people who are generous loaning out money in small ways, so I've been trying to do that, like by springing for the 1st pitcher of beer if you're out in a group or wherever.
Overall, I've found that people remember debts if you halfway know them and you run into them decently enough, so you're never really out any money, since it's all small amounts.
Anyways, the other week I was at a weekly informal school lunch-lecture function and an administrator from another division forgot her money, and since I know her from there, I volunteered to pay, and she could just get it back to me whenever.
The next week, I walk in to the lunch function, and the one (English) dean in my division waves me over, and she gives me an envelope from the other dean's division with the handwritten note "Delivered through the kindness of [my dean's name]", and inside was a note saying she couldn't come to the function that week and thanking me for loaning her the money, with not only the repayment, but the full price of another lunch, saying to enjoy herself on me!
I thought that was very nice. I put the note on my fridge.
Overall, I've found that people remember debts if you halfway know them and you run into them decently enough, so you're never really out any money, since it's all small amounts.
Anyways, the other week I was at a weekly informal school lunch-lecture function and an administrator from another division forgot her money, and since I know her from there, I volunteered to pay, and she could just get it back to me whenever.
The next week, I walk in to the lunch function, and the one (English) dean in my division waves me over, and she gives me an envelope from the other dean's division with the handwritten note "Delivered through the kindness of [my dean's name]", and inside was a note saying she couldn't come to the function that week and thanking me for loaning her the money, with not only the repayment, but the full price of another lunch, saying to enjoy herself on me!
I thought that was very nice. I put the note on my fridge.
Monday, May 28, 2012
Activisim (2 of 2): Later.
If/when I'm a professor, I would love to be faculty sponsor of the College Democrats group, and I'd really be an active one.
I think the 1st thing I would do is have a reading group where we read Saul Alinsky's "Rules for Radicals" and something bullshitty by Occupy, then discuss the goal-vs.-process dichotomy.
Based on interest, I would have the goal people do voter registration and stuff at school and try to do a community-organizing based model of voter turnout, and I'd have the Occupy-people do whatever the heck they do.
I'd organize occasional, courteous debates, where they would have to meet each other's objections (e.g. the community-organizing people saying they weren't getting anything done, the Occupy saying they aren't working for real change).
Overall, I think the more kids you could expose to real activism, not the bullshitty Occupy kind, the better.
I think the 1st thing I would do is have a reading group where we read Saul Alinsky's "Rules for Radicals" and something bullshitty by Occupy, then discuss the goal-vs.-process dichotomy.
Based on interest, I would have the goal people do voter registration and stuff at school and try to do a community-organizing based model of voter turnout, and I'd have the Occupy-people do whatever the heck they do.
I'd organize occasional, courteous debates, where they would have to meet each other's objections (e.g. the community-organizing people saying they weren't getting anything done, the Occupy saying they aren't working for real change).
Overall, I think the more kids you could expose to real activism, not the bullshitty Occupy kind, the better.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Activism (1 of 2): Now.
What really gets me about Occupy is that there is a ton of incredible leftwing activism going on right now.
The Obama campaign had *amazing* community-organizing that turned Indiana blue, and the same thing will be happening in Arizona, I hear.
In the Midwest, as well, there's been a ton of great union organizing in Ohio, Indiana, and Wisconsin.
A friend in psychology was saying that there's scholarly literature that divides groups into goal-focused and process-focused, over a spectrum, where the 1st focus on results, the 2nd on consensus-building, honoring everyone's voice, etc.
I think the trouble with Occupy is that it's the 2nd, but it also thinks it's the 1st.
The Obama campaign had *amazing* community-organizing that turned Indiana blue, and the same thing will be happening in Arizona, I hear.
In the Midwest, as well, there's been a ton of great union organizing in Ohio, Indiana, and Wisconsin.
A friend in psychology was saying that there's scholarly literature that divides groups into goal-focused and process-focused, over a spectrum, where the 1st focus on results, the 2nd on consensus-building, honoring everyone's voice, etc.
I think the trouble with Occupy is that it's the 2nd, but it also thinks it's the 1st.
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