Hipster karaoke – it was only okay (part I of II): Pre-karaoke.

So, the other Saturday night I went to hipster karaoke, after a long chain of events.

First, I went to this discount clothing store in my new neighborhood, to get a thin cap that I could wear under my bike helmet, since I was bicycling 25 minutes to the hipster neighborhood and it was getting cold out.

Second, I first went to a hipster coffee shop to read and whatnot for a few hours... I brought a few books, as well as a Greek dictionary and my copy of the Life of Mary of Egypt from Migne’s Patrologia Graeca, to read a bit (which I did, for the entire time I was there; I just felt like it).

Third, I met up with my one (white) friend from Mississippi and a (Canadian) colleague and the girlfriend of this other student who’s friends with everyone at the taco place to get some Mexican food at this place that has really good carne asada.

Unfortunately, the carne asade I had in my torta (which I ordered in Spanish – “una torta de carne asada con todo, por favor,” which made the [Mexican] waitress smile) was fatty and didn’t taste like usual, but the restaurant was otherwise fun...

For some reason we got talking about how brides can be selfish at weddings, and it turns out that my one (white) friend from Mississippi, who’s an ordained Baptist minister, had performed several, and he says he always cedes to the wishes of the bride.

“Were these family and friends or just random people you married?”, I asked.

“Well,” he was like, “I married my cousin...”

“Ha!”, I was like, “I hear that happens a lot in the south,” which made him laugh.

Later, too, he was saying how he would present a set of like five different types of vows, and the couple could pick one.

“Couldn’t they write their own if they wanted?”, the one girlfriend of this other student who’s friends with everyone said.

“No, not many people do that,” my one (white) friend from Mississippi was like.

“It’s not like that many people can read,” I was like.

Also unfortunate at the Mexican restaurant was the fact that when I arrived I had to take a huge shit because that morning I had had 2 huge bowls of oatmeal with oats I had gotten at the discount supermarket chain, and after I took this brown, watery shit with a bunch of backsplash and mopped up the excess ass-water around my asshole and fired the toilet paper in the water and flushed, I went to go wash my hands, only to discover there was no soap. And, we hadn’t eaten yet, and everyone was eating from a communal bowl of nacho chips and salsa.

But, luckily I thought to go to the register, and they had a giant bottle of hand sanitizer sitting out by the cash register that I used, so I was able to sterilize my hands... Luckily too no brown ass-water got on it, otherwise the sanitizer would have just smeared it around, and maybe not even sanitized it.

Unluckily, though, the heat in the restroom was like 95+ degress, so I left a really nasty muggy shit smell in their for whichever patrons used it next.