Some customers the day of the local Pride parade…

...at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now:

1) Two (like almost high school age) (white) girls come in and we sit them at a table at the back, and then when we’re off doing other stuff one just goes up to the service station and helps herself to a small styrofoam takeout box, and that’s on their table forever and they have glitter makeup stuff spread all across the table and some water and makeup stuff at the bottom of that Styrofoam box, and they have their own chairs and the unused chairs pulled out wide so it interferes with seating at the adjacent table, and at one point they even put dirty dishes on one of the adjacent tables, and when I go to reckon up with them they say yes they’re ready for the check, and then when I go to the back counter and get it and bring it up, at that point they tell me that they want to separate the bill out into two checks, and ultimately they tip less than you’re supposed to, to boot.

(For all that chaos… People would never behave like that so blithely, at a [non-Asian] restaurant.)

. . . 

2) A (quiet) (awkward) (Asian) (male-to-female trans) person who probably studies (STEM) comes in to eat by themself, and at one point they’re just kind of aimlessly wandering up the center of the restaurant with no clear purpose – looking for the restrooms? needing assistance? – and so as I walk towards them, I don't think and I’m like, “Can I help you, Sir?”

(Oops.)

. . . 

3) Two (older) (white) lesbians come in and are sitting at a corner table and for one of them I keep refilling her water glass for ever and ever, and at one point when I refill it again, she comments, “I just don’t know why I’m drinking so much water today,” to which I’m like, “Ecstasy?”, and, “You probably shouldn’t be rolling in the middle of the afternoon.”

Later, too, they have some discount coupon to pay that I’ve misfiled before, and so I tell them to wait until my coworker is back and can ring them up at the front if they bring it up there, and as soon as I say that, the one is well-meaning but a bit presumptuous and is like, “I can help you on the screen,” and she explains that she can walk me through it.

(Actually, it’s a recording system we have, because in addition to having to scan the proper coupon, you have to mark down numbers and make sure it’s the active coupon rather than an old one that's pulled up in the same on-screen list, because the sh*tty website doesn’t make that clear, and sometimes you only see old coupons or you finally locate an active coupon and scan it but then it disappears and you can’t tell which number coupon you scanned, it’s all very confusing.)