Two jokes that I made the other week with one five-top table at work...

...at the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now:

1) When it turns out that the (college-age) (alternative-looking) (white) girl of the party of five is there for her birthday with her (white) family, and I had already guided her away from one stir-fry and to one fried rice, when she had asked me for my recommendation:

"Man, I hope you like that entree, because I'd feel horrible if I ruined your birthday."

2) When they don't order dessert:

"Man, I wish I had known that earlier, because I would have put a birthday candle in your fried rice!"

. . .