A day at the (Thai) restaurant...

 ...that I work at now, the other week:

1) This (older) (white) customer is very insistent that he wants a side of hoisin sauce for his pad thai because it "adds so much to the dish" and I have to all be like, "Sir, I'm not sure that we have that," but then I go check in the kitchen for him and we do end up having it because we use it in one dish (the mongolian beef), and so I put some in a little tin serving cup and bring it out to him, and he tells me that he thought we'd have it, and at this other (Thai) restaurant that he goes to, they even have it out in little bottles on every table, he likes it so much and he thinks that's just great.

2) The (old) (very short) (sourfaced) (homeless) (white) woman who sometimes smells like (urine) and who I've had to increasingly shoo away from the patio tables at lunchtime had left her plastic bag of stuff out by the patio tables the previous night before and had never come back to retrieve it, so I go to go throw it out, and spilling out of the plastic bag are a neatly cut and freshly Ziplocked half-sandwich where the bag is open at the edge and some ants are crawling into it, and a somewhat crushed but otherwise clean plastic bottle of water with the bottle label still on it, and some dirty panties, but not dirty like ass dirty, but dirty like from being otherwise clean, and then laid up against something with a fine layer of dustlike dirt on it, leaving these varying bar streaks of umber dirt against the pastel yellows and blues.

3) Two (middle-aged) (very fat) (low-class) (white women) app delivery drivers come in, just apple-shaped and waddling all around and throwing attitude everywhere they go, and they have these little children who are running around and piping up a yell here and there and going around by the front door and sometimes putting their hands everywhere onto it and leaving all of these greasy marks, and somehow they both don't seem to be in there for the same order, there's just coincidentally just like two of them and they both happened to come in around exactly the same time, and they are just both in there fat and casting attitude everywhere they go, and they're both there for like all of five minutes, and then they are gone.