Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Life among the Hasidic Jews of Williamsburg (1 of 4): Wedding Night.


From Deborah Feldman’s Unorthodox: The Scandalous Rejection of My Hasidic Roots (2012; pp. 167-168):

“You can take a shower now,” I call into the dark of the apartment.  [My husband] Eli is in the kitchen, still dressed, uncorking a bottle of cheap kosher champagne.  “Your favorite.  [Your aunt] Chaya told me,” he says.  I smile quickly.  I don’t really like any wine at all.

As he showers, I go to the bedroom with my champagne flute in hand and set it down on the nightstand.  My mother-in-law has already laid out layers of cheap towels over one of the beds, and there is a bottle of K-Y jelly as well.  I put on a long white nightgown.

I sit down on the bed next to the nightstand and pop open the bottle of K-Y, squeezing a pea-sized blob onto my fingers curiously.  It’s surprisingly cold and viscous.  Carefully, I lie down on the bed so that my hips are on the towels and reach down to anoint myself gingerly with the clear, cold jelly.  I don’t want to get the new linen dirty.  It’s very dark, until Eli opens the bathroom door and light pours faintly into the apartment.  He comes into the bedroom wearing a towel wrapped around his waist, and the outlines of his body are strange and new.  He smiles uncomfortably before squatting on top of me like his teacher said, letting the towel roll off.  I still can’t see much.  I ease my knees apart and he moves closer, adjusting his weight on his palms.  I feel something hard nudge my inner thigh.  It feels bigger than I expected it to.  He looks at me anxiously in the darkness.  He’s nudging everywhere, waiting for some sort of direction from me, I think, but what do I know?  This is as much a mystery to me as to him.

Finally he pokes, I think, in the right area, and I lift up to meet him and wait for the obligatory thrust and the deposit.  Nothing happens.  He pushes and pushes, grunts with the effort, but nothing seems to give way.  And in fact, I can’t see what should.  What is expected to happen here? 

After a while he gives up and rolls over to one side, his back to me.  I lie there for a few moments peering up at the dark ceiling before I turn to nudge him slightly.  “Are you okay?” I ask. 

“Yes.  I’m just very tired,” he murmurs.

Soon I can hear him snoring lightly...

. . .

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