Hospital (2 of 4): Veins.

When the nurses were going to get the IV in me,

the first prominent vein in my arm didn't work all of a sudden

-then-

the second vein deep in my arm they couldn't quite find

-then-

the third vein elsewhere deep in my arm they couldn't quite find, and as they moved the needle around it was like someone was stirring a small knife in my flesh as my flesh resisted

-then-

and finally they just the vein near my elbow, where they usually draw blood.

That night when I was in bed and about to go to sleep, I thought about how bad the pain was from the 3rd time that they tried to find my vein, and how even though I could barely deal with pain of that level - I started involuntarily moaning and saying "Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck" - that torture would be much, much worse, and how I probably couldn't stand up to torture like POWs and other people who've faced it.