Addendum.

I forgot -

Way back when during the discussion group following the documentary about really butch black lesbians, after my one friend who works at a rape crisis hotline's boss talked about her time in the military and how gay it all was, in fact one of the gayest places in all the U.S., one person who regularly attends the docs, this social activist girl around my age, said that that was really interesting, since back when she was graduating from high school, this really athletic guy from her class who everyone knew was gay really wanted to join the military, and everyone was like, "But you're gay and you don't know it yet," and he said that he really didn't know, but he knew that he wanted to join the military, and he did it and loved it, and he did turn out to be gay.