On Saturday I was at a hipster/yuppie coffee shop listening to the oldies station they had tuned in -- oldies are everywhere here!; I love it -- and as soon as it came on, I realized that Reunion's "Life is a Rock" would be the best karaoke song ever.
I also have been trying to think up dirty lyrics to Molly Malone. Here is my best shot, though I need help on the last line:
"In Dublin's Fair City/
Where girls are so pretty/
I first slipped it in/
To sweet Molly Malone.
"In the fishmarket alley/
On pavement so smelly/
I rammed my love-muscle/
[not sure what would come next]."
Ideally, the last lines would somehow have a euphemism for "vagina" that would be somewhat similar to "alive alive-oh".
Monday, October 29, 2007
Dream: Graveyard.
Last night I dreamed I was in a fairly treeless graveyard standing in front of a grave and over to the right of me like two graves down and slightly forward were two mid-30s, tastefully-dressed white women with shoulder-length hair and those semi-circular things you use to hold your hair back, and they were talking about a campaign to have engraved on every gravestone the importance for American culture of genealogy and finding about your past, which measure had already been passed in Oklahoma. I looked over to my right and there was a grizzled cemetary caretaker in a down vest, and I told him that they were Mormons trying to further their pro-genealogy agenda, and when he said he didn't think genealogy was that big deal and that it was actually kind of nice, I started to explain to him how Mormons baptism the dead and that's why they research genealogy, not because of the schmaltzy reverence-for-the-past stuff they wanted engraved on the tombstones.
Then I woke up.
Then I woke up.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Clarification: Me and black people.
I hope no one thinks I'm making fun of black people. I take great pleasure in black culture, but I also really admire it. Even in the ridiculous parts of the A.J. Johnson interview, this deeply-felt idea of community responsibility and uplift pervades every word, something you just don't get in white culture (though is there such a thing?).
A whole heap of blackness (pt. IV of IV): Back at work.
I just saw my (black and in her 60s) friend who mans the guard station at the main library on campus, since she had fallen and broken her ankle and has been out of work for like a month and a half now. She asked me if I had gotten a haircut, and I told her a month ago, but she said the lines were clean, and I told her that I had been keeping the lines clean with a razor ever since she told me about clean lines a few months ago. I then asked her how her ankle was, and she was like, "Oh, it's doing fine, but it sure does mess up my switch."
A whole heap of blackness (pt. III of IV): N'Sight.
From another article in this week's "N'Digo: The Magapaper for the Urbane" that was also unfortunately not put online, this one about a successful black publisher of poetry and literature:
Although it struggles to survive, the moderate success of TWP's authors has kept the company at the head of the pack. The "Covenant," Madhubuti says, has put the company in a position to publish two or three books a week. But he shuns publishing what he labels 'booty call literature,' the salacious paper back titles that mostly are self-published but are among the hottest sellers.
Never heard of that genre before. I wonder where I can get it.
Although it struggles to survive, the moderate success of TWP's authors has kept the company at the head of the pack. The "Covenant," Madhubuti says, has put the company in a position to publish two or three books a week. But he shuns publishing what he labels 'booty call literature,' the salacious paper back titles that mostly are self-published but are among the hottest sellers.
Never heard of that genre before. I wonder where I can get it.
A whole heap of blackness (pt. II of IV): Pulchritude.
From Bonnita Jones's "Pulchritude" column in this week's "N'Digo: The Magapaper for the Urbane":
Greetings & Style-u-tations,
You see her everyday — at work, waiting on the bus, dancing in the clubs, driving with the top down, living the fab life with the girls in Bronzeville, dropping off the kids at daycare, “Miss Popularity” at school, buying groceries or next in line to get her nails done… she may have it all together, but one thing you didn’t know… she’s hooked on weave!
That’s right, she’s a track addict…
Greetings & Style-u-tations,
You see her everyday — at work, waiting on the bus, dancing in the clubs, driving with the top down, living the fab life with the girls in Bronzeville, dropping off the kids at daycare, “Miss Popularity” at school, buying groceries or next in line to get her nails done… she may have it all together, but one thing you didn’t know… she’s hooked on weave!
That’s right, she’s a track addict…
A whole heap of blackness (pt. I of IV): N'Tertainment.
From this week's N'Digo: The Magapaper for the Urbane (oddly, no article up online so I have to type this shit out, though it's totally worth it):
A.J. Johnson is the Hollywood personality you would love to hate, but not hate in a vicious way. Nah. You hate her like you hate your girlfriend who seems to have it all together. And then, of course, there's your love for her. You love her because she's your girl--the one who has always been there, and you know it will always be that way. That's A.J. Johnson. She's as down-to-earth as the girl next door, but has the body of those envy-inducing magazine covers with airbrushed celebrities on them. (Her body isn't fake, though.)
...but the fitness guru and founder of the AJ Zone hasn't always been passionate about living a healthy lifestyle and delighting in its benefits. After losing a few family memeber (including both parents), prematurely to possibly preventable deaths, Johnson decided to make a lifestyle change, and she's encouraging you to do the same...
FOOD IS A MAJOR PART OF THE URBANE CULTURE. CAN YOU REALLY COOK SOUL FOOD WITH NO- AND LOW-FAT INGREDIENTS WITHOUT COMPROMISING THE TASTE?
What's our focus? Is our focus maintaining our culture and cultural habits, or is our focus trying to save our lives? Our cutlure is making us drop dead at 40! We're dying. Gerald LeVert shouldn't be dead.
It may taste different, but is it still tasty? Yes, it is.
Food doesn't have to be our culture. If our culture is killing us, let's start another culture. Let's make riding bikes a part of our culture.
WHAT ARE THE BIGGEST MISCONCEPTIONS OR EXCUSES USED ABOUT STARTING A WEIGHT LOSS PLAN?
"I don't have time. I can't afford a gym membership. My man likes me thick... I have other things to do..."
Because we're living such an unhealthy lifestyle, we're not seeing the signs of what's wrong. Take eating pork, for instance. Many people say when they eat too much pork, they get a headache, so they get used to having a headache. So what if you're having a headache because you have a brain tumor but you're used to having a headache? You won't even recognize the headache as something wrong. You're not heeding the warnings...
LET'S TALK ABOUT A TYPICAL AMERICAN WOMAN: SHE HAS A COUPLE OF CHILDREN, A FULL-TIME JOB, VERY LITTLE PERSONAL TIME, AND A LIMITED BUDGET. SHE CAN'T AFFORD A PERSONAL TRAINER, BUT SHE'S REACHED A POINT IN HER LIFE WHERE SHE KNOWS IF SHE DOESN'T DO SOMETHING, SHE'S LIKELY TO START HAVING MAJOR PROBLEMS. WHAT ARE SIMPLE THINGS SHE CAN DO TO CHANGE HER LIFE?
...Instead of driving to the fast-food place on lunch break, she can walk and get a low-calorie, low-carb, low-fat lunch.
Bad health is a domino effect. It starts with what you feed your system. If my body is trying to deal with a bad relationship and digest a big, juicy steak at the same time, that's a lot. That takes a lot of energy.
Healthy living has a look and a feel, and it's contagious, and it's sexy!
A.J. Johnson is the Hollywood personality you would love to hate, but not hate in a vicious way. Nah. You hate her like you hate your girlfriend who seems to have it all together. And then, of course, there's your love for her. You love her because she's your girl--the one who has always been there, and you know it will always be that way. That's A.J. Johnson. She's as down-to-earth as the girl next door, but has the body of those envy-inducing magazine covers with airbrushed celebrities on them. (Her body isn't fake, though.)
...but the fitness guru and founder of the AJ Zone hasn't always been passionate about living a healthy lifestyle and delighting in its benefits. After losing a few family memeber (including both parents), prematurely to possibly preventable deaths, Johnson decided to make a lifestyle change, and she's encouraging you to do the same...
FOOD IS A MAJOR PART OF THE URBANE CULTURE. CAN YOU REALLY COOK SOUL FOOD WITH NO- AND LOW-FAT INGREDIENTS WITHOUT COMPROMISING THE TASTE?
What's our focus? Is our focus maintaining our culture and cultural habits, or is our focus trying to save our lives? Our cutlure is making us drop dead at 40! We're dying. Gerald LeVert shouldn't be dead.
It may taste different, but is it still tasty? Yes, it is.
Food doesn't have to be our culture. If our culture is killing us, let's start another culture. Let's make riding bikes a part of our culture.
WHAT ARE THE BIGGEST MISCONCEPTIONS OR EXCUSES USED ABOUT STARTING A WEIGHT LOSS PLAN?
"I don't have time. I can't afford a gym membership. My man likes me thick... I have other things to do..."
Because we're living such an unhealthy lifestyle, we're not seeing the signs of what's wrong. Take eating pork, for instance. Many people say when they eat too much pork, they get a headache, so they get used to having a headache. So what if you're having a headache because you have a brain tumor but you're used to having a headache? You won't even recognize the headache as something wrong. You're not heeding the warnings...
LET'S TALK ABOUT A TYPICAL AMERICAN WOMAN: SHE HAS A COUPLE OF CHILDREN, A FULL-TIME JOB, VERY LITTLE PERSONAL TIME, AND A LIMITED BUDGET. SHE CAN'T AFFORD A PERSONAL TRAINER, BUT SHE'S REACHED A POINT IN HER LIFE WHERE SHE KNOWS IF SHE DOESN'T DO SOMETHING, SHE'S LIKELY TO START HAVING MAJOR PROBLEMS. WHAT ARE SIMPLE THINGS SHE CAN DO TO CHANGE HER LIFE?
...Instead of driving to the fast-food place on lunch break, she can walk and get a low-calorie, low-carb, low-fat lunch.
Bad health is a domino effect. It starts with what you feed your system. If my body is trying to deal with a bad relationship and digest a big, juicy steak at the same time, that's a lot. That takes a lot of energy.
Healthy living has a look and a feel, and it's contagious, and it's sexy!
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