1) After I re-gift some (Thai) baggy elephant pants to a (high school) friend who's a math teacher -- they were a post-vacation present from the owners of the one (Thai) restaurant where I work now to all of their workers, except they were too tight in the thighs for me -- anyhow, those pants fit my friend great and he likes them, so he texts a picture of them to his girlfriend, who writes him back, "Now don't go leaving me for a crystals chick."
2) When my dad gets a double-scoop ice cream cone of this intriguing raspberry and chocolate flavor, I come over with a spoon and take a little bit out of the bottom scoop to try it, and am like, "I hope that didn't destabilize your ice cream cone, for you."
3) When I go to visit my one friend who's a hair stylist, I actually pull into her neighbor's house since it's right before hers and it's built the same as 1 of 3 identical houses in a row, and the guy is nice and everything and points me next door, and then she tells me that that actually happens a lot.
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